This is actually a song from the 2022 released film 'Ek that Villian Returns'. This 'Ek tha Villain' Series is kinda my nemesis. I cannot handle violence that well, makes me very uneasy. Especially, violence against women. I remember the first film in this series had Riteish Deshmukh as the villain who murders Shraddha Kapoor. So even though, it had a couple of good songs in it, I did not watch that movie. The second one, I didn't even pay attention to. The songs did not seem to catch on and hence I did not pay any attention to it at all, until a couple of weeks ago. The youtube algorithm or the TikTok algorithm I am not sure recommended this song to me. I did not recognize the singer of this song Altamash Faridi. His soulful singing did capture my heart and as I listened to it, I was completely enamored. I heard it on repeat many times and every time I heard it, it captured me even more. There are some songs that have good music, some that tug at your heartstrings with their lyrics and some that are sung with so much intensity that they pull you into their world. Well, this song had all that and more.
I want to stop gushing here and take you to journey this song with me so that you can better understand my errr, gushing!
tera asar oh bekhabar
main kho gaya jaane kidhar
The beginning is perhaps a little simple and basic with the protagonist setting the stage by letting his lady love (and us) know that she's been unaware of the effect that she has on him, that he feels utterly lost somewhere.
Now that the stage has been set, he goes on to sing -
tu mere paas hain abhi,
tho lamhe khaas hain abhi!
I absolutely love the interplay of words in these lines to convey the fact that the moments spent together (paas) are still special (khaas). The addition of the word abhi (still) adds to that magic dust gathering around. Abhi can be used to refer to the present moment, but it also adds to the continuity of the emotion. That you are with me, and these moments are special as long as you are with me. The poet Tanishq Bagchi, could easily have removed the word abhi from it and retained the meaning mostly by penning
tu mere paas hain,
tho lamhe khaas hain!
But by adding the word 'abhi', he takes it to a whole another level where the moment goes beyond the present to capture eternity in its continuity.
He continues with -
Na jaane kab hua yaqeen,
ke kuch bhi tere bin naheen!
Don't know when I came to the belief,
that there is nothing without you...
This happens to be a recurring theme in the song - the fact that he is slowly but surely coming to the conclusion that his existence depends on her presence. This realization is gradual as he gets more and more into her. It's like he kept falling for her more and more until one day it dawns on him that his being is completely engulfed by her, to the extent that he feels like there is nothing without her, a turning point in his life that makes him sing -
Na tere bin rehna ji,
Na aur kuch kehna ji...
going with the theme of nothing without you that rings throughout this song - basically saying that I don't want to live without you and won't say anything more than that. Period. Again, the play of 'ji' here is fascinating similar to the play of abhi...adding that layer of familiarity - tenderly addressing her inthe first ji and perhaps the rest of the world in the next ji...like an afterthought, that he doesn't have anything else to say and doesn't care that much anyways. A finality of what he sees life as progressing from there onwards considering his realization earlier.
and then come the magical stanzas -
ke jagte jagte,
main umr beeta doon
This is where the song pivots dramatically—almost like stepping into another timeline. The earlier stanzas lull you into believing this is a lovey-dovey romantic song brimming with love and longing. But then, these lines arrive like a quiet storm, hinting to the fact that he doesn’t have her in his life, at least not yet. But that doesn't deter him - he’s ready to spend an entire lifetime waiting.
This is where the song jumps to another timeline, I believe wherein we get to see that sad state of affairs. The first few stanzas established how much he loves her and before you settle into the fact that this is a lovey-dovey romantic song come these which hint to the fact that he doesn't have her in his life and is willing to wait for her all his life as he croons -
I will keep awake (stress of awake by repetition of jagte!)
and spend my life
The repetition of jagte is powerful. It’s not just about staying awake, its more about keeping vigil day and night for her arrival in his life.
Na ek pal chaina ji,
Hai saath mein rehna ji
There is not a moment's peace,
Have to live with you...
and then the repetition
ke jagte jagte,
main umr beeta loon...
Confirming the fact that they are not together since he's restless and wants to be with her even if it means being awake his entire life waiting...so wonderfully they tie it to the previous stanza...reinforcing his longing and eternal waiting...
Jo baaqi saans hain abhi,
woh tere paas hain abhi
Repetition of the abhi patterns saying that
whatever breaths are left still,
they belong to you still...
mujhe ab ho gaya yaqeen,
ke tere bin main kucn nahin...
I have come to the conclusion,
that I am nothing without you
tying it back to the lines that have appeared before...another ongoing theme with the song. But taking it a step further by saying that not just everything else but he himself is nothing without her. There are so many dynamics in this song, its simply mind-blowing.
Naa Tere Bin Rehna Ji
Na Aur Kuchh Kehna Ji
Ke Jagte Jagte
Main Umar Beeta Loon
Everything is brought together to end this section of the song which ends in yearning and longing.
Longing for what? We will know more as he continues the rhythmic journey -
Kareeb Aa Tu Iss Tarah
Saansein Mile Do Jis Tarah
Main Tere Sang Yeh
Safar Guzarun
Come near me in such a way,
that two breaths meet each other,
I with you,
want to journey together
That is the longing! The journey here of course is meant to symbolize the journey of life. A journey where he happened to meet her and that meeting inspires the following -
Mile jo Tum Mujhe Abhi
Toh Ho Gaya Mujhe Yakeen
Kitna Main Tanha
Bheed Mein Raha Hoon
When you met me now,
I started to believe, (this is a play on the line from before where says the same thing with the word Yakeen in a different way)
How alone,
amongst a crowd I have been
Again, this song is about self-realization from the protagonist who is finding out in myriad different ways her importance in his life: that he is nothing without her, that he is alone even in a crowd without her...reminds me of the lyrics from Aashiqui that go like - tanha tanha lauta hoon main tho bhari mehfil se (I have returned alone from a crowded party).
Yeh Zid Mein Hi Rehna Ji
Judaai Nahi Sehna Ji
He's getting a bit bolder now after realizing how much she means to him. He is saying that now he is going to be stubborn and won't be without her.
Ke Hanste Hanste
Main Gham Tera Ro Loon
These 2 lines are again very magical. Don't think you can find a parallel to any song here as he says,
that he would with a smile (laugh to be more precise), he would cry her tears and sadness. Can you imagine like 8 words conveying the intensity of love better than this - that he would be basically happy to take on her sadness and would be happy to do so!
I am going to skip the repetitive sections here, but they add so much to the song. Be sure to listen to them and see how well they fit in with the flow of the song.
Agar Tu Na Mile Mujhe
Main Lamhe Rok Loon Yahin
Jahan Se Hum Shuru Hue
Main Dohraun Woh Pal Sabhi
These 4 lines go so well together that I did not have the heart to separate them.
If I don't manage to have you,
I will stop the moments right here.
Where we started from,
I am going to repeat all those moments
Again, such a novel way of conveying the fact that he doesn't want to live without her. That he would basically put a break to his life if he doesn't achiever her and restart living the moments they have lived since they got together. Uff!
Before you think that his love is too intense and he might be smothering her with it, comes the gentle reminder to her and more so to himself that his love is not conditional, it is just there, without expectation, without reciprocation even!
Tujhe Main Chahun Iss kadar
Na Chahe Tu Mujhe Agar
Main Tujhse Mohabbat
Karta Rahunga
I will love you to such an extent,
that even if you don't love me,
I will keep loving you
I feel like this song is going along the lines of the 7 stages of ishq - one level higher than the other wherein ultimately the lover does not need the loved to be present. Slowly but surely, you can see that his love continues to ascend more and more to the extent that he is not even worried about whether she loves him or not. He is not going to stop loving her no matter what she feels. I think this is the purest form of love, where you continue to love someone even though they might have moved on or for some reason are not part of your life anymore. After all, as Shakespeare's Sonnet 116 says -
“Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken.”
Watch as the protagonist takes this one step further saying -
Yeh Khaalipan Manzoor Hai
Ismein Nahi Tu Door Hai
Jahaan Tak Dekhun
Tu Hi Dikhega
This emptiness is acceptable to me,
In this you are not far from me,
To the extent I see,
I only see you
This again I feel is another higher stage of love where he says that he is fine with the loneliness or the emptiness that comes from loving her because the emptiness is due to her. In that emptiness too wherever he looks, he finds her since she is the cause of it. Basically saying that an emptiness caused by her is more dear to him than any fullness he might find in the world that is not related to her.
Ishq Tera Pehna Ji
Sach Toh Yahi Haina Ji
Ke Behte Behte
Main Raah Bana Loon
I have worn your love,
and it is indeed the truth,
that as I keep flowing,
I will make my way
There was once a time in my life when someone told me when I mentioned that a certain thing would have been impossible to accomplish, that they had a way of slowly chipping away and achieving the impossible with perseverance, persistence and stubbornness. That no matter how long it takes, if it is important to them, given a chance they would realize the goal. That confidence in one's own ability to achieving dreams seems believable just like how one also wants to believe in the hero here as he says that wearing her love, he is confident that he will find a way to get to her as he keeps making ways towards her by flowing along!
The confidence seems to grow as he tells her
Main Aadha Jee Raha Yahin
Adhoori Tu Bhi Toh Yahin
Kinaare Woh Jo Na Mile
Unhein Milna Toh Hai Kahin
I am living half (incomplete) here,
you are also incomplete here,
The shores that do not meet,
have to meet somewhere
This is how the song ends with him telling her that he feels half himself and the other half happens to be her is there too with him. He goes on to say that the shores that might seem like won't meet ever have to converge somewhere. This ending shifts the tone from despair to faith, a quiet conviction that love will find its way, even if the present feels impossible. It’s not just romantic; it’s existential, suggesting that their union is inevitable in the grand scheme of life.
As you can see, the song comes a full circle and closes the arc in the end, just like the shores of river closing the gap beyond the visible horizon.
*****
PS: I was in a conversation where it was discussed that the era of longing and yearning seem to be over because we are in the age of instant gratification where once you start missing someone you can pick the phone and call them. I would say that rings true when the situation is right but in circumstances like these where for some reason, you can't really pick up the phone and call, the yearning and longing still exists and how better can it be conveyed than through each word in this song.
What I like most about this song is that it brings together so many hues of life - hopelessness, yearning, helplessness, resignation, inevitability, hope, confidence, faith, tears and most of all the fact that soulmates will find their way towards each other in the most impossible of circumstances.
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